I’ve been pretty good at dealing with my feelings lately and catching potential problems and Feeling and Dealing with emotions. Every-so-often, something slips through and I get triggered.
go What I mean by “triggered” is something happens in the present that sets off alarm bells from the past. The best way to explain this involves something happening when my brain is brought back to a point in my childhood along with the emotions I had in the past. This sets my brain in an emotional state in my past while I’m experiencing the present moment.
In this case, I came home and was disappointed that my wife didn’t do something for me. Before this disappointment, I was feeling some great happiness because I got a new toy I’ve always wanted. Now with this mixture of happiness followed by disappointment triggered me back to my past when I had the same emotions except things went fro okay to bad with no normal explanation for my young brain to figure out.
Buy An Original Essay So now, my emotional state is that of extreme fear. Something really bad is about to happen to me. I was happy, and now I’m disappointed. These emotions usually followed me getting in trouble and spanked.
here I was in extreme fear mode. I had to divert attention away from me before I get in trouble and spanked (see, my mind’s in the past – adults needn’t fear spankings). Someone is getting spanked and it’s not going to be me. This is when I am most deceitful because I’m in a life or death struggle to not get spanked.
click By the way, this is all in hindsight. Now that I’m out of this mode, I can look back and understand my mindset was in the past. There is no father figure that will spank me. I’m not a little kid who’s in fear of his life because he’ll get a spanking.
go to site If, at that moment, you asked me if I was having a problem, I would flat out deny anything was wrong. You see, if I actually admitted I was having a problem, then I would surly be in trouble and the world would truly come to an end for me (again, I’m in my shadow world or living in a past emotion).
This is when I am the luckiest man in the world. I have a wife who I’ve come to trust. She is strong and aware enough to recognize when I’m in this shadow. I trust her enough that no matter what’s going on in my head/world, she can just say:
- I think there’s something you need to deal with.
- You seem to be having problems.
- Something’s not right.
There are definitely times when I go kicking and screaming that nothing’s wrong (which is a sure sign that my emotions are in the past). At this point, I have to feel it and deal with it.